The month of March, which here in Maine is still firmly entrenched in winter, is always a struggle for me. It’s the low point of my year. I was explaining to BlackLion recently that this year, I’ve decided to make March better for me by practicing exquisite self-care.

That phrase immediately captured his attention. He wanted to know more – and in describing it, I thought you might like to learn about it, too.

I’m at a point in my life where self-care is a regular part of my life. I meditate and journal each morning. I go to yoga classes, spend time with my favorite people, and eat delicious foods. I get plenty of sleep. I’m a pretty happy person, overall, and that’s thanks to my regular spiritual practice.

Yet, like everyone, I have times when I’m under some extra stress, or just feeling low. (Hello, March.) That’s when I up my game. Rather than beating myself up for not feeling at my best – which I have done in the past – I devote myself to feeling better.

For me, right now, this means more time alone (like taking myself on an Artist Date or just going to bed early to read and think), reducing my sugar consumption, getting more exercise, and lowering my expectations around productivity. It includes a focus on what I most need, a higher level of self-care, and some super-powered nurturing.

It involves a lot of listening, as what I need can change from day to day.

Exquisite self-care won’t look the same for you as it does for me, or for anyone else on the planet.

To figure out what your most high-level self-care is, ask yourself these questions:

• In what area(s) of my life do I most tend to struggle and feel stress? It could be finances, romantic relationships, work, parenting, creativity, health, or something else.
• How could I best support myself in thriving in that area of my life?
• What do I most need right now?
• How would I treat a close friend who came to me seeking support?
• Can I commit to being my own best friend and nurturing myself with compassion? What actions support this commitment?

Treating yourself to exquisite self-care might include:

• Reaching out for some extra support from others. You might desire a friend to confide in, an extra session with your coach or therapist, or want to receive a nourishing massage. Maybe you long to gather in a circle of sisters or to seek some adventure – road trip time!
• Perhaps, like me, what you want most is some down time to just go deep within and BE. Maybe your body needs extra sleep, simpler foods, or more (or less) exercise.
• Getting quiet and listening to your heart. There’s no need to hide. Avoid defaulting to unhealthy patterns that might feel good for a moment, but don’t really serve you. Deep inside, you already know what you truly need in order to thrive.

Instead of scolding yourself or feeling disappointed when things don’t go as you’d planned, give yourself the gift of exquisite self-care. You deserve it.