I stepped out onto my mother’s misty back porch. Despite the light sprinkle, the birds were chirping and squawking, flowers were still sweetly scented and the air vibed with ionic dihydrogen oxide. Even pondering that moment, new questions kept arising.

Why is it important to be a whole person?

Well, you know what isn’t working, right? When you focus on old and disempowering habits, you remain dogmatically ignorant. We sometimes purposefully ignore, poo-poo or dismiss the good parts of our lives because our brain and ego have learned that “the squeaky wheel gets the grease.”

Focusing on distractions like the internet, television or some other obsession that is not fully in line with our core beliefs, is common. Actually, we get so accustomed to our routines, whatever they may be, that we habitualize our “bad” habits and forget to make time for self-nourishment.

Ever try to keep a regular spiritual practice up for more than a few days? The good intentions of New Year’s resolutions succumb to the momentum of the hamster wheel of our misguided and self-destructive beliefs. Now, this is not to say any of this is “bad” nor to admonish yourself (again) for not following through. Most people never even consider any alternatives to their lives. So bravo!

The challenge is, how do we include self-love practices that open us up to our greatest potential, to become wholly ourselves?

And, to ask yourself, “How does the best me think, feel, and act on a regular basis?”

Now’s the moment to go on a mini-vision quest and insert your ideal day:

When you wake up, do you open your eyes to the brilliant sunshine, stretch and smile and cheer for another day of adventure?

Do you feel nourished by your breakfast and enjoy your morning beverage while journaling?

Does your schedule allow for creative time and social gatherings with friends and family?

Does your work bring you joy and really matter to you?

Do your conversations help you explore your passions more deeply?

Do your relationships open in exciting ways?

Of course, your visions may vary. In fact, we change on a regular basis, so having a perfect day is different from day-to-day. One day a party boat with pals is the best thing, and the next, a bubble bath and some chocolate would be all you’d want to handle.

Self-care is as varied as people’s opinions, and we get to have as many of those as we want! So whatever is valuable to you is beneficial. When you have a preference you are expressing your unique self right now. Isn’t that a great thing?

This doesn’t go against the laws of physics – it’s intimately your truth. You just keep forgetting that the cause and effect is based first in your thoughts and then the “outside” world events happen – not the other way around. The world is not happening to you, it is responding from you – your intelligent design, the divine creator, the one called by God and Goddess.

You are that spark.

And when you create from your whole self, love, truth, justice, peace, laughter, joy and harmony are at the core of what you receive. You are already pure positive energy inherently, that’s why good things happen in your life. Because you believed it could happen to you.

And every time it felt like the other way? Examine the cause of your own habits, examine the cause of your dogmatic ignorance, examine the cause of your worry, doubt, anxiety, and fear. It’s because when you preach from a place of fear, the world will agree and bring you the universe through that filter.

And if you do your life based on hope, peace and love, that will be the filter in which the universe yields to you. It’s not rocket science to get that the way you perceive the world is the way the world responds to you. But don’t take my word for it. Science is about doing your own experiments to prove it to yourself.

So, learn what nourishes you, then practice that. When you feel bad, learn to feel better. When you feel great, give yourself a cheer and go deeper. Notice your feelings and thoughts, then change them or encourage them.

Recognize the tidings and gifts in the moment because they are always there, you just need to unfilter them and see clearly. Awareness is a wholesome practice. And that’s the most important gift you can give yourself to become truly whole.